Table 5 Expressions of motivations to donate/ accept / wait for deceased donor, expected and experienced changes in relationship
Statement category | Specific statements of participants classified in this category |
|---|---|
Motivation to donate / accept / wait for deceased donor | |
· Concern for donor’s health | I was too afraid that my wife would not come out of the surgery so well (DD recipient A4) |
· Relationship changes | I was afraid that in case of an argument the kidney would be brought up, even just as a joke. I didn’t want that (DD recipient A5) |
· Personal benefits | I wanted to have a normal life again. In fact, the entire family was sick too (LD recipient B6) |
I did not want my children to see their father this way. I was prepared to go to great lengths for that (donor B7) | |
Social pressure | |
· Social pressure doctors | The nephrologist said:"She needs a kidney transplantation as soon as possible, otherwise it is not necessary anymore, she will die without a kidney" (donor A11) |
Expectations of relationship changes | |
· Fear of imbalance in relationship | May I still argue with the donor? I was afraid not (LD recipient B8) |
I was afraid that after the transplantation it would be hard for me to say No to the donor (LD recipient B4) | |
I was afraid I always had to be nice to the people who had given me a kidney (DD recipient A6) | |
Experienced changes in relationship after surgery | |
· Closer relationship | The relationship is just as good, maybe even closer because we share this together (LD recipient B5) |
We’re closer than we used to be before the transplantation: it just happened (donor B4) | |
· Imbalance in relationship | I struggle with the balance. I do not dare to say No to the donor as I would want to do (LD recipient B4) |
I have the feeling I have to be grateful all my life (LD recipient A4) | |
I feel obligated to maintain a good relationship with the donor, while she is not my type (LD recipient A5) | |
· Meddlesomeness donor | Once in the month: did you take your medication? (donor A4) |
It is spare time for the recipient so be careful with yourself (donor A8) | |
· Changed relationship with others | The relationship with the partner of the recipient also improved (donor B4) |
The mutual relationship of the children has become closer in the period that both their parents were sick (donor A7) | |
We were disappointed that nobody in the family offered to donate a kidney. We try to still maintain a good relationship (donor B6) |